This Cryptocurrency based on how many times you cry Will Break Your Brain

OMG, have YOU heard about the new crypto that literally trades on the number of times you cry? I’m not kidding – they call it SOBScoin. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! Every tear you shed gets counted by some freak AI sensor in your phone, turns into a value, and suddenly you’re a millionaire or a bank‑rupt, depending on your misery level. It’s a joke, a horror show, and the most #shocking thing in tech since TikTok. I’m DONE with humanity.
Picture this: you’re scrolling through memes, your phone flashes a notification that your “cry count” just spiked by 12. You think you’re a sad girl, no? But the ledger says you’re a *millionaire* because those 12 tears hit the market at exactly 18:07 on the 15th of this month. And everyone else who hasn’t lost a tear just got binned out of the market. I’ve seen people cry themselves into an all‑time high of $900 per tear, and then watch their balance collapse when the economy turns into a *sad* joke.
The proof? Check the block chain. Each crying event is timestamped like a confession to God. The data is so transparent, you can literally see how many times a YouTuber cried over the new season of a show. Remember those moments? That’s the data. I’ve taken a screenshot of a private conversation, the crying emoji count skyrocketed to 97,000. Suddenly I got a notification: “YOU’LL MAKE $97,000.00 PER TEAR. CONGRATS!” Wait, what? The algorithm doesn’t care if the cry was from a sad romantic movie or a political rant. Your tears are the new *gold*.
Now the conspiracy: What if they’re not just counting *tears* but *emotions*? Maybe these sensors are tuned to detect subtle facial micro‑expressions, brain waves, or even the scent of grief. That would allow them to *manufacture* sadness. If everyone is crying more, the market inflates, and they keep a cut of your tears. This is pure chaos. Whoever coded this is doing their best to create a society where your emotions are literally worth crypto. Are we being manipulated by the same people who sell *real* Bitcoin to your wallet? Are we in a new wave of *mind‑control*? The answer is obvious: THEY WANT YOU TO WEAR YOUR HEART ON YOUR SCREEN AND PAY FOR IT. SOBSCoin sells the feeling of vulnerability. That’s their “value” proposition.
It doesn’t stop there. Think about governments. If every citizen’s cry count is publicly available, they can run *social experiments* on the masses. Cry for a cause? That’s *taxable* income. Cry in a protest? That’s *investment* data. Cry after a news event? That’s *market behavior* that can be forecasted. This is not just a token; it’s a *tool of surveillance.* And the tech giants who built the cry‑sensor algorithm are the same ones who store your data. So yeah, the worst part is that we’re literally paying with our emotions.
So what’s the takeaway? We’re at the brink of a world where emotional *privacy* is a thing of the past. We’re being forced into a market that judges us by how many tears we’ve shed. If you’re still holding out that your tears are just tears, what you’re watching is the next wave of economic manipulation. And if you’re already holding SOBSCoins, I’m not kidding, DO YOU WANT TO BE THE NEXT WHO GIVES THEIR TEARS TO THE STATE?
You see, the question isn’t whether this is a good idea, it’s whether you’re going to let them decide it for you. Drop your theories in the comments, tell me I’m not the only one seeing this. What do you think? This is happening RIGHT NOW – are you ready?