🔥 Things That Shouldn’t Exist

DON’T YOU HAVE ANY ACTUAL CAREER!? I JUST WASN’T EXPECTING MY BATHROOM TO TURN INTO A MICROBIOME SCIENCE LAB. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! The new “Smart Toilet Supreme” that judges your diet is the latest absurdity that…

OMG. You won’t believe the latest circus the internet is throwing at us: NFT TOILET PAPER. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! I mean, did the creators of digital assets run out of memes and decided to print their…

OMG, YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT I JUST DISCOVERED—DATEING APPS FOR MY PETS ARE IN THE MAKING AND IT’S PURE CHAOS! WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! I SCROLL THROUGH MY PHONE, LOOK AT THE SAME STUFF I CAN FIND…

Shit, did someone just drop a horror movie in the snack aisle and call it a snack? AI‑generated potato chips that scream when you bite them? WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! I’m DONE with humanity because what else…

OMG, NO ONE EXPECTED THIS, BUT I JUST STUMBLED ON THE MOST ABSURD, MIND-BOGGING, NEWLY REVEALED HACKTIVIST TREND: NFT TOILET PAPER. Seriously, WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! I REMAIN STANDING, SKEPTIC, AND WISHFUL TO LEAVE A COMMENT IN…

Did you hear about the new cryptocurrency that actually counts how many times you cry? YES, I’m talking about CryCoin—an app that turns your tears into tokens, and it’s already trending like a meme in 4chan and TikTok. WHO THOUGHT…

OMG I JUST stumbled onto the most insane thing on the internet and I can’t even keep a straight face. Have you seen the AI‑generated potato chips that literally SCREAM when you bite them? WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD…

OMG, I just hit the bathroom the other day and this freaky, high‑tech toilet decided to give me a one‑minute TED Talk about my last lunch. Yes, you read that right: a SMART TOILET that judges your diet like some…

OMG STOP IT RIGHT NOW—YOU GUYS JUST HAVE TO AWE THIS CRAZY CRYPTO THAT IS ALL ABOUT HOW MANY TIMES YOU CRY. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?! I’m DONE with humanity for creating a meme coin that literally…